


sousu-gay and his bitch

by kitcatkandy (unpeumacabre)



Category: Free!
Genre: Crack, M/M, and makoharu fuck on the cold steel floor, hahaha, it wasn't steel but fuck it, main ship is sourin, the concept is steel applicable to the story, very gay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-03
Updated: 2020-02-03
Packaged: 2021-02-28 06:21:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 827
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22549231
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unpeumacabre/pseuds/kitcatkandy
Summary: or,it's not gay till ur balls touch(and their balls touched a lot. lol)this is a crack-fic my medic friend and i wrote when we were very tired and also procrastinating, enjoy
Relationships: Hazuki Nagisa/Ryuugazaki Rei, Matsuoka Rin/Yamazaki Sousuke, Nanase Haruka/Tachibana Makoto
Comments: 2
Kudos: 7





	sousu-gay and his bitch

**Author's Note:**

> my medic friend is a rly good riter lolz also we were 12 y/o in 2069 when we wrote this happy valentine’s day xx (x)

Rin glared daggers at Sousuke. “Do you think it’s okay for you to have sex with dogs?”

Sousukw rolled his teal ass eyes. “Rin, I knnow you think you’re a hot piece of ass but you can be a real bitch sometimes, you know that?”

Rin grabbed him by the collar. “You say that again BIITCH?”

Sousuke blinked, but then he laughed maniacally. “Hahaha lol.” he said sexily, flipping Rin over his shoulder. “Little do you know I am a black belt in judo. So judon’t want to piss me off, got it?”

“How did I fall for such a loser,” asked Rin to the gods. Haru shrugged emotionlessly from Iwatobi, because Haru is god.

“Hello Rin and Yamazaki-kun,” said Makoto, randomly appearing half naked. “Why are you both naked?”

“Bitch, we are all swimmers,” said Rin, at the same time as Sousuke said, “Hey, Tachibana, wanna Tachibang-a?”

“WHAT THE FUCK,” said Rin at the same time as Makoto stared at Sousuke. From a distance you could hear Haru screaming like a little bitch.

“YOU WANNA STEAL MY MAN I WILL CUT YOUR DICK OFF AND FEED IT TO YOUR MOM.” said Haru from that distance.

“How the fuck can he scream so loudly from so far,” said Rin.

“Haru has strong lungs. The compliance of his chest wall means he has a much greater functional residual capacity than normal plebeians,” said Makoto adoroingly. “He has been hyperventilating, as he has to respond to his body’s–”

“Makoto, shut the fuck up we all swim here,” said Rin, at the same time as Sousuke said “lol nerd.”

Nagisa and Rei appeared too. “Why the shit is everyone from Iwatobi here,” said Rin, face palming.

“Maybe they just want to witness your sexy bod,” said Sousuke, glaringly. Makoto laughed awkwardly, trailing off when he realised nobody else was laughing. Nagisa opened his mouth to say some stupid shit but Rei stuffed his dick in it before he could say shit

“So,” said Rin.

“Sou-suke,” said Nagisa through Rei’s dick.

“I hate you all,” said Sousuke just as Haru randomly emerged from the water. “Why the shit is Nanase here? Why can’t we have a break up in peace?”

“WHAT?!!!” said literally everybody but Haru, who didn’t give a single shit.

“YOU WERE GOING TO BREAK UP WITH ME?” said Rin clutching his bare chest. Makoto dropped his sandwich. Rei nervously adjusted his dick which was still in Nagisa’s mouth, which in hindsight might not have been the best move. Anyway, Rin glared daggers at Sousuke, who stared coolly back. Haru got out of the pool and looked between them. then he looked into the camera like he was in an episode of The Office

“yes, I am breaking up with you Rin, for a real bitch,” said Sousuke, turning away imperiously. “You are a real pain in the ass– literally– butt I found a real one who will be at my beck and paw.”

“Can you shut the fuck up with the dog puns,” said Haru in a monotone. Makoto moved over to him protectively. Haru shrugged and then they had rough sex on the floor.

“Uh,” said Rin, looking between Nagisa and Rei and Haru and Makoto. “I feel unsafe right now.” (A/N shoutout to liv!!! the cutest!!!! we live her!!!)

“Same bro,” said Sousuke, frowning and rubbing his eyes. “Let’s go somewhere more private.” insert lenny face

They left Samezuka and wondered into the streets of Iwatobi. Gou appeared and said “Hello Onii-chan!”

“Gou away,” said Rin. Gou left.

“Do you think it worked,” said Rin, draping his hands over Sousuke’s broad as shit shoulders. Sousuke leaned his head against Rin and laughed.

“Ha ha ha,” he said. lolz. Then he turned sincere and looked imploringly at Rin’s huge dong. “I hope you know, little Rin, that I would never leave you for a bitch. Because…you’re my bitch. My one and only bitch.”

Rin rolled his red eyes. “That’s gay bro. You’re literaly talking to my dick, bro.”

“It’s not gay till your balls touch,” said Sousuke, waggling his eyebrows and also his dick. Moving his hips in helicockter fashion.

“Well we should do something about that then,” said Rin. So they had public sex on the roads of Iwatobi and yes, their balls touched so it was definitely gay.

Haru walked out, still half naked for some reason. He was also sticky with some strange white substance. Makoto followed sheepishly behind. “Y'all nasty bitches,” said Rin, just before Sousuke dicked him down.

“I hate this town,” said Haru. Makoto rubbed his back comfortingly. And then his dick too lolz

So they lived happily ever after. And Rin and Sousuke had sex like all the time. The end.

A/N hii guys! lolz I know this isn’t veery good haha but its my first ever fanfiction!!! feedback is MUCH appreciated, thannk you guys!!! #sourin5ever #newauthor #dontforgettoleavekudos !!1!1!!! comments are love <333

published in 2069


End file.
